Choose the time and place carefully to create a situation where the conflicting actors are receptive, relaxed, and open to mediation

Do not do act until you have calmed down if you are upset or agitated

Pay attention to your nonverbal messages and use your body language to signal openness and avoid defensiveness

Always try to agree on something whether it is the overall or more specific goals, basic values, the strategy, concrete methods, or some important facts

Restate the issue, as you see it, and ask for feedback from the conflicting parties

Ask the conflicting parties what they feel about the issue and ask them not to second-guess each other

Listen actively by paraphrasing what the other person says and create space for corrections

Examine your part in the conflict by considering how something you may have done has contributed to it

Ban generalizations such as “you always…,” or “I never…” from the conversation and encourage the actors to stick to the issue at hand

Brainstorm possible solutions and choose the best alternative that gets support from the conflicting parties.