Chapter 6: The Visceral Curriculum

A third of my mom’s clients are therapists like her. One couple seeing her for marriage counseling a few years back began a session by saying, “We think you’re secretly the cleaning lady.” My mom beamed telling the story back to me. It was one of the best compliments she had ever gotten.

“How is that a compliment?” I asked.

“They didn’t see me in my role: I was a human being who was there. In therapy, you have to talk about something. But the real stuff happens on a totally different level.”

She was talking about the experience of being with another person, the experience of meeting and being in the presence of others beyond what feels predetermined and scripted.