Chapter 3: A Third Space Where I went into a Slump: Struggles, Inner Conflicts, and Reflections
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Published:2023
Juwariyah Siti, 2023. "A Third Space Where I went into a Slump: Struggles, Inner Conflicts, and Reflections", Narratives of TESOL Professionals: Experiences Navigating the Doctoral Program, Kayi-Aydar Hayriye, Steadman Angel, Shea Kate
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The narratives of doctoral graduates often revolve around successful stories upon graduation such as landing a job, research opportunities, and a rise in career. This somehow neglects the hardship doctoral students experienced while pursuing and finishing a PhD. Further, there is little discussion about graduates who might still be struggling to decide the next path in their life such as those who do not immediately work or those who decide to take a break, the reasons why, and how this might affect their life personally and professionally. Hence, in this chapter, I share my personal story around and upon graduation. It will feature my previous educational and occupational background and how finishing my dissertation might have made me feel burnout. These feelings of burnout affected my next decision to take a break before returning to full-time work or hunting for a job that I can and really want to do. This chapter will portray how I think of and reflect on both my identity as a doctoral student that was anxious about her future in a third space as well as a doctoral graduate with presumably “a gap in the resume.” I will also talk about how this “gap” might hinder me from doing (academic) things that require an affiliation to a workplace or a university. The challenge of applying for jobs for which I might be considered “overqualified” will also be presented. Finally, I share how networking with my cohort in the doctoral program was really important during this transition. I hope that by writing this chapter, I can help those who can relate to my situation and, perhaps, prevent doctoral students from experiencing a similarly challenging situation upon graduation.
