Chapter 44: Professor/Parent

Professor. Parent. Two halves of a whole. For most of my academic career I have tried to keep these identities in balance, to maintain a sense of homeostasis. If the two halves add up to a whole, though, I cannot do both roles well. More of one means less of another. In the pre-tenure days, the balance was near impossible to maintain. I began my academic job when my children were two and four. For days, I would hide away in my home office or at the university, writing papers and grading papers while my children grew. The best days—and also the worst days—were when my partner would take the kids away for the weekend. More professor. Less parent. They went hiking in the White Mountains in New Hampshire while I finished my book. They went to Ithaca to see the gorges while I prepared classes. More time for work. Less time for fun.