Chapter 43: Tenured Professor, Novice Parent: A Pandemic Tale of Love and Learning

I’ve been an educator for almost 20 years; taught and loved other peoples’ elementary aged children as my own as a teacher and counselor, then continued to facilitate learning for adults in educational leadership preparation. I don’t have biological children of my own, so my role as a parent, in caring for children, had been limited to my experience as an educator and as an aunt to my two nieces and one nephew up until 2017. It was then that at the age of 39, I married my partner, who has a son from a previous marriage. I didn’t get to meet my stepson, or “bonus” son in person until 2018, as he was only 6 years old then and lived in Florida with his mom. Since then, we’ve been able to have our son with us in Austin, TX for holidays and during the summer. Over the course of these visits and given the long distance between us, there’s been a lot of learning and adjusting for our family of three, and particularly on my part as a stepmom; figuring out and respecting the boundaries of my role, working to build a solid, respectful and loving relationship with my now 8-year-old stepson while also reconciling my ideals and realistic practices of parenthood with those of my partner.