Chapter 13: He Is My “Stone”

After I read my son’s work, it was very interesting. I thought it was thoughtprovoking. I thought it was well thought out. I feel my mind is going a thousand different ways right now. I had no idea how powerful this art would be for my son and thinking about his life and who he is as a young man. It was an emotional experience for my son. It went deep, real deep. The art was a reflection of what my son had not shared with me. And because of this art, I know my son on a different level. I used this art to help me talk with my son. I used this art to connect with my son in new ways. I had no idea this was going on with him. Stone, my son, really thrived and shined with this art. He shared with the world what he was going through in believing Whiteness is good and being darker has its share of consequences. My son can pass for White and talked about wanting to be with a White woman and having White children so they don’t have to go through what he goes through. Even though he is light-skinned, some White people think he is Black and other White people think he is White. He talked about this in his art and he also talked about not belonging in this family. He doesn’t look like me or like his brother. We have darker complexions. Stone told the story of going to a restaurant with his family. The host did not include him in the family count because he didn’t look like us. White people often assume he is not a part of our family and they want to figure out “what he is” rather than wanting to know “who he is.” It’s something my son has had to deal with his whole life, but I didn’t know this was on his mind. I am grateful for this art experience. It gave my son a place to think and share about his life. It also gave my son and I a chance to talk about things I needed to talk with him about as his father. He is my son. He is my Stone.