Chapter 14: Using Student-as-Researcher Models as a Mode of Resistance and Agency: Creative Maladjustment in an Urban High School

The first film that Xitlalli produced for our media production class is about the moment she found out that her mother had died. It is only a few minutes long, but at the end of it we are all shocked into silent crying. She speaks of the moments before when her family gathered together to tell her that her mother is gone. She speaks of the sudden sense of panic when she realizes that something is very wrong. Then she speaks about the disbelief, the chaos, the sense of being underwater she feels when the words finally come forth. I am heartbroken and at a loss when she continues to speak about the disintegration of her family who, two years after her mother’s death, do not know how to cope with their grief and anger.