Be a leader not a follower! Parents, teachers, camp counselors, siblings, grandparents, and a multitude of other authoritative persons wag fingers or, in disciplinary tones, convey this message to children. Most often these messages are given after some unfortunate experience involving following the crowd that led to a phone call or note home. Guardians want their children to be able to think independently and make good decisions about the people they are around. In most Black families, however, the instructions are usually followed by additional advice around not embarrassing the family with your actions and remembering you are representing more than yourself.

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