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Purpose

This paper aims to investigate learning, relatedness and ethics in research as question of personal responsibility. Positivist and postformalist approaches to research are considered in light of the perspectives and experiences of the researchers themselves.

Design/methodology/approach

These questions are considered through an autoethnography of postformalism based on the doctoral research of the author.

Findings

The conclusion of this work is that research inclusive of affect, reflexivity and the context in which the research takes place, allows for insights into organizational ethics that would otherwise not be possible. However, these approaches come at a personal and professional risk for the researcher. Truly authentic postformalist research demands a degree of hazard for the researcher, becoming both a way of living and an ethical choice.

Originality/value

This paper addresses the ongoing debate concerning the use of first-person research, in general, which has not received a warm welcome as a “serious” form of research, especially in the more conventional methodological circles. The conclusions open up new considerations for first-person methods, such as autoethnography.

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